February 11th, 2009

25 Things I Would Do Ahead Of Bothering To Hack Someone Else's LiveJournal Account

  1. Clean the downstairs bathroom with a bald toothbrush.
  2. Varnish my cats' toenails claws.
  3. Finish my tax paperwork for next year.
  4. Wash the dog (that I don't have).
  5. Analyse the wear patterns of each of rotwang's socks.
  6. Read Les Miserables again.
  7. Alphabetise the bottles in the recycling bin.
  8. Find a pattern online for a macrame bra.
  9. Scan all of my non-digital photos.
  10. Finish Rock Band on all difficulties and all instruments.
  11. Shave my hair off.
  12. Design a program to graph phone usage down to the minute from a scanned British Telecom bill.
  13. Write a letter to my local paper.
  14. Find a TRS-80 emulator online and retype some of the old programs for it. (Bonus points if it was a program which did something completely useless.)
  15. Hook my TRS-80 up to the network and post to LiveJournal from it.
  16. Make pasta from scratch.
  17. Arrange my book collection in alphabetical order of the seventeenth word on the twenty-third page of the books.
  18. Count the sheets of paper in the stationery cupboard.
  19. Petition Royal Mail to put William McGonagall on a stamp.
  20. Write a set of haiku describing the ways in which static IP addresses make life easier.
  21. Give rotwang a foot massage.
  22. Swim the English Channel.
  23. Finish reading the World's Biggest Dungeon.
  24. Learn to play the accordion.
  25. Get a life.